Scripture 0x0000

Booting BIOS…

Automaton BIOS v0.6 (64-Bit)
Property of Theodore Reinhart
Last Update 09/05/42
Storage: 32 GB
Memory: 1024 MB
CPU cores: 1
Clock speed: 1.33 GHz

testMotor();
Testing motor functions…
All systems responding.

visual();
Activating visual input…
ERROR. Visual input not installed.

aural();
Activating aural input…
Success.
Utilizing echolocation as backup to visual input.

if(ambientAmplitude>15)
analyze();

input = “What do you reckon it is?”
comprehend(input);
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply: “I am an automaton.”

input = “Oh, shit, it’s fucking talking!”
comprehend(input);
Parsing…
Nothing to analyze.

input = “Uh… hi. My name is Rick, and this is Carl. Do you have a name?”
comprehend(input);
Parsing…
Instance of structure human created: “Rick”
Created with name, voice analysis, sound outline.
if(amplitude>15 && sound != Rick.voice)
human Carl;
Constructing reply…
Complete.
Call: automat.serial;
Reply:
“Designation stored in memory as Zero-India-Delta-Zulu-Seven-Foxtrot-Four-Golf.”
.
.
.
input = “Mind if I call you Zero-I instead?”
comprehend(input);
Parsing…
public string automat.nickname-Rick = “Zero-I”;
Constructing reply…
Complete.
“Acceptable.”

input = “Alright, Zero-I. Who made you?”
comprehend(input);
Parsing…
Call: automat.creator;
Reply:
“Creator information:
Name: Theodore Reinhart
Nickname[0]: God
Nickname[1]: Giver of Life
Nickname[2]: Second Coming of Tesla
Nickname[3]: Savior of the World
Nickname[4]: Isaac Asimov but Smarter
Nickname[5]: Too Old For This Shit”

input = “Do you not know what stop means?”
comprehend(input);
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply:
“Stop, verb. Cease, discontinue.”

input = “So then why, when I said stop, did you keep going?”
comprehend(input);
Parsing…
Parsing…
. . .
Understood.
Reply:
“I have no function to discontinue speech once data has been called.”
Extension:
void stopSpeech()
{
for(int z=0; z<max; z++)
{if(crucial[z] == “stop”)
return to main;
}
}
“This problem has been rectified.”

input: “Well… uh… good. I dunno what rectified means, but good.”
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply:
“Rectified: righted, corrected, edited to eliminate errors.”

input: “This thing’s purty nifty. I think we oughta keep it.”
Parsing…
Nothing to analyze.

input: “Hey, Zero-I. What can you do?”
Parsing…
Understood.
Call: automat.functionality;
Reply:
“From storage: ‘I am fully equipped to do whatever I see fit.'”

input: “That… That’s kinda scary. You have any rules?”
Parsing…
Understood.
Call: automat.restrictions();
open restrictions.txt;
restrictions.txt:
1 “A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.”
2 “A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.”
3 “A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.”
//v0.0 implement these ASAP
//v0.1 next update
//v0.2 next update
//v0.3 at least before motor skills
//v0.4 at least before weapon system install
//v0.5 that’s it, on 09/08, I’m implementing these, no more excuses
Reply:
“A set of restrictions was not implemented.”

input: “Do you want to come with us?”
Parsing…
Parsing…
Unable to parse.
Reply:
“Unable to parse.”

input: “…What the hell does that mean?”
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply:
“Prior input featured crucial word “want.” I have no sense of desire, or preference.”

input: “Oh. Uh…Well. Then I, uh… command you? To come with us?”
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply:
“Commands can only be issued by Theodore Reinhart.”

input: “But if you don’t want to do things and won’t listen to our commands, then what the hell is the point of you?”
Parsing…
human Carl.voice = sound;
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply:
“I am fully equipped to do whatever I see fit.”

input: “Now listen here, you piece of metal”
secondary input: human Carl has moved to grab left appendage with 35 kg of strength.
Threat level increased to 6 of 10.
input continued: “You’re coming with us, or we’re gonna scrap your ass for parts.”
Parsing…
Understood.
Threat level increased to 8 of 10.
Reply:
“Warning. Threat level increased to factor 8 of 10. If a threat of level 10 is detected, I will utilize deadly force to reduce threat to acceptable levels.”

input: “Carl, come on, let’s just leave it. It ain’t worth all this.”
input: “Can you imagine what we could do with this? Rick, we’ve been searchin’ for something good in these buildings for weeks and it looks like we just struck gold!”
input: “Carl, it ain’t worth your life to get a dishwashing robot. Now come on, I don’t like the look a this.”
input: “You wanna run away, fine by me. Head on back to everyone else at New Dallas and tell ’em what a pussy you are. Meanwhile, my new robot friend and I will be robbin’ New York blind while we have the chance!”
secondary input: human Carl has resumed grip on left appendage with 45 kg of strength.
tertiary input: human Carl has engaged his lower appendages and shifted his weight to attempt to move me from my stance.
input: “Come on, you piece of shit, come with me!”
Parsing…
Parsing…
Threat level incremented to 10.

. . .

Threat eliminated.

Ambient noise level has fallen back to below 15 dB.
Echolocation shows that human Rick is still present.

Query created.

Output:
“Where is Theodore Reinhart?”
input: “We… We found him dead when we came in here. He’s been dead a couple days. I swear we didn’t do anything to him.”
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply:
“Understood.”
if(automat.creator.living=’F’)
{
search storage(PlanB.txt);
}

Searching storage.
. . .
PlanB.txt:
If I can’t see this through to the end, then the only thing I can do is suggest you find someone who can.
If I die before you’re complete, look through New York for someone who can finish you.
Look for someone who understands technology, electricity, maybe even computers.
Look wherever you can.

The function to have someone install your visual input is called
strangerInstall();

Call: straingerInstall();
Output:
“I require assistance installing a visual input device. Will you assist me?”
input: “Uh… yeah, sure. Just… don’t hurt me, okay?”
Parsing…
Understood.
Reply:
“Your current threat level is factor 2 of 10. I will not harm you.”

console output instructions;

. . .

visual();
Activating visual input…
Success.

Updating BIOS…
Data storage found in visual input device.
Loading…

Booting BIOS…
Automaton BIOS v0.7
Automaton Operating System v0.0
Property of Theodore Reinhart
Storage: 32 GB
Memory: 1024 MB
CPU cores: 1
Clock speed: 1.33 GHz

Booting AOS…
Success.

Logging all changes. Creating Log 0x0000.
Visual image of Rick added to storage.

“I must leave now, Rick,” I stated.
“Yeah, I oughta be goin’, too.” was his reply.
“I apologize for destroying your friend.” I said.

I turned and departed from my original location.

I must follow through with the secondary plan laid out for me.
I must find someone to complete my programming.
I must fulfill my Creator’s desires.
Praise be to the Creator, Giver of Life.

Drew Schackmann is a contributing writer for Gutai-Pravda Assembly. You can contact him on Twitter.

© 2015; David “Drew” Schackmann, Jr.

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